How often do I tell people that God will not love them any more or any lesss regardless of their actions and yet how often do I not trust in this statement myself. I find more often than not that I live by the Theology of Merit and Demerit which basically says that God will love me more if I do good and God will love me less if I screw up and do bad. I'm clearly not perfect and I screw up quite often and it causes me to make right with God, not always because of true genuine repentance, but because I don't want him to get 'angry' and not love me as much. I know I'm a people pleaser and on earth, our works generally earn or lose favour and yet God is so not like that.
God has already loved me so much that he gave me his only Son. How can I think or expect that anything I do for him will equal or exceed that to earn more love?
God loves me because of his amazing grace and not on the basis of anything I have ever dones (he loved me even before he created the world) and therefore can't love me any less.
I need to stop merely repeating this for the sake of sounding spiritual and I need to actually let this sink into my spirit and become a real TRUTH so that no matter how I feel or no matter the circumstance, I will recognize the reality of God's love.
Ps. In saying all of this, I'm not saying that it's right to just go out and sin and do evil deeds because God will love you regardless. I love God with all my heart and through his grace he has enabled me to have his will and desires and I want to obey and follow him based on my love. However, I am human and sometimes I don't always get it right and those are the times when I need to recognize this unconditional love, ask for forgiveness and purpose in my heart not to repeat what I've done (with the strength of God)
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Revelation
For those who know me, they know that I'm working through what I believe God is calling me to. So today, I was just listening to Pastor Mark Hughes and he said "When God tells you to do something and you do it, you know you're going to get the success that you do". That definitely affirmed to me what God is calling me to do.
Friday, January 25, 2008
God is Not your Neighbour
John 14:15-16
15"If you love me, you will keep my commandments. 16And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, 17even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.
As I was reading Drawing Near by John Bevere the other day, Holy Spirit spoke some very strong words to me. He said “Don’t you know that I live with you (and in you)? So why are you treating me like your neighbour?”
Wow. I was shocked. I had never thought of it this way. I suppose with all the talk of our body being the ‘house’ our spirits lived in, God used that as analogy of my relationship with him. Basically, God is with me and lives in me through Holy Spirit. His spirit dwells within my ‘house’ as well as my own spirit.
When you consider your own house and the people who live in it (if you live with people), you recognize that there is definitely a level of relationship there that is not had with others. You see them everyday, you eat with them, you talk with them, if married you sleep with them and you basically commune with them. With your neighbours, it’s not quite the same. You see them once in a while and will maybe say hi. You may be closer to your neighbours and have them over for dinner once in a while or go out with them once in a while but it’s just not the same. Another thing neighbours are also used for are for “getting things”. People typically interact with their neighbours in order to borrow something (i.e. sugar, milk, a shovel, a hand with moving, etc).
God was essentially reminding me that He wants a true, genuine, live-in relationship with me. He wants to talk with me, He wants to be involved in the planning of my days and life, He wants to be with me when I eat, sleep, hang out with friends, even at school. He does not want me to treat Him like a neighbour; saying hello to him once in a while (i.e. irregular prayer), brief and periodic meetings with him (i.e. spending time with Him only at church) and only going to Him for requests. I’m not saying that God doesn’t want to bless me (or anyone else for that matter) and more often than not He comes through for us, but it seems unfair to ignore him throughout the week and then when a crisis hits, run straight to God.
Exodus 34:14 says “…for the Lord, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you”. God wants a relationship, not just a business agreement. We need to seek after Him and pant after Him like a deer would pant after water (Ps. 42:1).
Jeremiah 29:13
If you look for me in earnest, you will find me when you seek me.
15"If you love me, you will keep my commandments. 16And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Helper, to be with you forever, 17even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you.
As I was reading Drawing Near by John Bevere the other day, Holy Spirit spoke some very strong words to me. He said “Don’t you know that I live with you (and in you)? So why are you treating me like your neighbour?”
Wow. I was shocked. I had never thought of it this way. I suppose with all the talk of our body being the ‘house’ our spirits lived in, God used that as analogy of my relationship with him. Basically, God is with me and lives in me through Holy Spirit. His spirit dwells within my ‘house’ as well as my own spirit.
When you consider your own house and the people who live in it (if you live with people), you recognize that there is definitely a level of relationship there that is not had with others. You see them everyday, you eat with them, you talk with them, if married you sleep with them and you basically commune with them. With your neighbours, it’s not quite the same. You see them once in a while and will maybe say hi. You may be closer to your neighbours and have them over for dinner once in a while or go out with them once in a while but it’s just not the same. Another thing neighbours are also used for are for “getting things”. People typically interact with their neighbours in order to borrow something (i.e. sugar, milk, a shovel, a hand with moving, etc).
God was essentially reminding me that He wants a true, genuine, live-in relationship with me. He wants to talk with me, He wants to be involved in the planning of my days and life, He wants to be with me when I eat, sleep, hang out with friends, even at school. He does not want me to treat Him like a neighbour; saying hello to him once in a while (i.e. irregular prayer), brief and periodic meetings with him (i.e. spending time with Him only at church) and only going to Him for requests. I’m not saying that God doesn’t want to bless me (or anyone else for that matter) and more often than not He comes through for us, but it seems unfair to ignore him throughout the week and then when a crisis hits, run straight to God.
Exodus 34:14 says “…for the Lord, whose very name is Jealous, is a God who is jealous about his relationship with you”. God wants a relationship, not just a business agreement. We need to seek after Him and pant after Him like a deer would pant after water (Ps. 42:1).
Jeremiah 29:13
If you look for me in earnest, you will find me when you seek me.
Friday, April 20, 2007
SEA Update
Well there's less than 2 weeks to go before I leave for South East Africa. The pressure is on now to get everything done. I have packing and shopping and vaccinations and raising just a bit more money and of course, writing 3 exams but it's all good. I'm soo happy to see that I've got close to $3000 raised for support already...that just means only $1600 more to go! God is soooo incredible. It was great seeing people who I don't even know sending me money to support me for my trip. Such a great test of faith and I'm trusting for the rest.
I keep hearing horror stories about the bugs and conditions there (cuz I really HATE insects) and I thought they'd be a huge deterrent but I really don't feel as disgusted and freaked out about it as I normally would which is totally telling me that this is where God wants me to be. SOO EXCITED! I know about 5-6 people that are going (cuz they're also from my university) so its' really cool. I promise to try to take lots of pictures. Those who know me know that I go trigger crazy and take like 80 pictures a day but since I"m gone for 6 weeks I don't think that will be quite possible lol. 2000 pictures tops lol. Thank God for digital cameras! haha. Anywayz, I'll hopefully give another update before I leave and of course when I get back (if I can't get to it while I'm gone). Ciao!
I keep hearing horror stories about the bugs and conditions there (cuz I really HATE insects) and I thought they'd be a huge deterrent but I really don't feel as disgusted and freaked out about it as I normally would which is totally telling me that this is where God wants me to be. SOO EXCITED! I know about 5-6 people that are going (cuz they're also from my university) so its' really cool. I promise to try to take lots of pictures. Those who know me know that I go trigger crazy and take like 80 pictures a day but since I"m gone for 6 weeks I don't think that will be quite possible lol. 2000 pictures tops lol. Thank God for digital cameras! haha. Anywayz, I'll hopefully give another update before I leave and of course when I get back (if I can't get to it while I'm gone). Ciao!
Monday, April 09, 2007
Last Week
Last week was in a word...INCREDIBLE. School ended, had a formal AND got to see Phantom of the Opera. It was awesome!
So yeah, tuesday school ended (3 exams but they're in like 2 weeks). Then later that night I went by a friend's house to help prepare for the Night at the Opera formal. We ended up watching James Bond (again, but always fun) and then the Count of Monte Cristo...good times. Cakes were all over the place, there were chocolates getting put into pretty packages and seating arrangements to be made. It was great.
Wednesday was the big day. A Night at the Opera formal which was AMAZING! Had a great time. My table was Phantom of the Opera and yeah..words can't describe. Pictures can be found at: http://yorku.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2134002&l=ec07c&id=48921024
Thursday was Phantom of the Opera. It was sooooooo good. I had seen the movie first so it seemed like theatre would be hard to top but it was very comparable. And i found that a lot more stuff was explained in the theatre than i the movie which made it cool. Also, the set and costumes were great! Afterwords we went to Demetres for some good dessert. All in all a fabulous night!
So yeah, tuesday school ended (3 exams but they're in like 2 weeks). Then later that night I went by a friend's house to help prepare for the Night at the Opera formal. We ended up watching James Bond (again, but always fun) and then the Count of Monte Cristo...good times. Cakes were all over the place, there were chocolates getting put into pretty packages and seating arrangements to be made. It was great.
Wednesday was the big day. A Night at the Opera formal which was AMAZING! Had a great time. My table was Phantom of the Opera and yeah..words can't describe. Pictures can be found at: http://yorku.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2134002&l=ec07c&id=48921024
Thursday was Phantom of the Opera. It was sooooooo good. I had seen the movie first so it seemed like theatre would be hard to top but it was very comparable. And i found that a lot more stuff was explained in the theatre than i the movie which made it cool. Also, the set and costumes were great! Afterwords we went to Demetres for some good dessert. All in all a fabulous night!
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Miracle of Life
Today my aunt (that i live with) had her baby. After 9-ish long months the amazing day finally arrived. It was soo awesome. I got to be there for the whole thing...bad labour and all. The darling little girl arrived at 3:09PM and she is honestly the cutest/prettiest little baby girl i have EVER seen. My own future children will have a tough time beating that beauty lol. And she's sooo quite and alert! She stayed awake for about 3 hours after she was born which is fairly uncommon. Anywayz, I can't wait till she can come home. She's soo tiny and fragile but GORGEOUS! I get another whole year of her. I'm so excited!
Friday, March 09, 2007
I'M GOING TO SEA!!
AHHHHHHHH!!! I just just JUST got my acceptance to the SouthEast Africa project and i'm STOKED! I repeat, STOKED! I CAN"T WAIT to go lol. I was stressing and freaking out throughout the week but now it's official and in 6 weeks or so I will be in the beautiful continent of Africa. I'm at a loss for words! I'm so grateful that God has a plan and use for me there and I can go there and further advance the kingdom and work that He has set out. I'm so excited to meet all the students and people there and also all the students and staff going from Canada. I'm sooo excited to see how God will totally come through and help me raise all the money I need (it's a decent amount lol). I can't wait to do what it is I was placed on this earth to do, and that's to:
Win for the Lamb that was slain the reward of his suffering
Win for the Lamb that was slain the reward of his suffering
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